I might be turning eight this year.
With my birthday only two days away you’d think I’d be all, OH MY GOD IT’S ALMOST MY BIRTHDAY like I have been doing for all of the birthdays in the past. Actually, I usually celebrate a birthweek. Growing up my parents would get me something for my birthday but if we were out the reasoning “but it’s my birthday” could be used the entire week surrounding my special day. When I was in grade school I was convinced (probably because of my parent’s constant insistence that I was more special than the rest of the kids, and let’s admit it, they are correct) that midterm break in February was taken because it was my birthweek. Screw Washington and Lincoln. Liz was born and she’s more special than that wooden-toothed, cherry tree chopping bastard on the $1 bill.
I don’t know why this worked every year. And I mean EVERY YEAR. I was in college and pulling this shit. And you could see on my roommate’s faces that they thought it was so incredibly ridiculous that my parents, the people who often tell me to get a life, or grow up, or NO YOU CAN’T USE OUR CREDIT CARD TO PAINT YOUR DORM ROOM BARBIE PINK, would actually let me get away with acting like a seven year old for a whole week. And I think people find it even more annoying that now, as a married woman, I could possibly still act in such a way but my husband completely accepted the fact that I should and will have a birthweek and everyone around me has to comply.
Accept this year I could really not be bothered. People keep asking what I’m getting for my birthweek, what special stuff will I be doing, should they bring in streamers so I don’t feel like there is a section of Dublin not celebrating my birthweek but I’m all, eh we should save the celebrating for Easter. Jesus rising deserves the hype.
So does this mean I’m finally maturing? Or does this mean that since I know I shouldn’t have a gazillon presents that I actually don’t want them? Are pigs flying? Did Hell freeze over? Are NKOTB doing a reunion tour? All good questions – no good answers.