I need Sally Struthers.
For some reason here in Ireland we have a Bennigan’s. I don’t know why you would have a Styrofoam version of an Irish pub IN IRELAND but they opened one up at Dundrum Town Centre (to be Europe’s biggest shopping mall. One day.) so the American-ness can just leak through the door and into Ireland and the Irish can think American’s are even biggest a-holes (I act 13 for my mom, okay?) than they all ready think we are. (And just for the record, I don't think we're a-hole or b-holes or any other kind of hole. I think the rest of the world is just very misguided.)
What I think is really funny about Bennigan’s is that on their menu they have a steak dinner called “Riley’s Ribeye”. Riley. Spelled the American way. Wow. And I think it comes with rice. I don't think I have ever seen an Irish person eat rice willingly. It's like a minuscule potato and totally not worth their time.
Normally I would frequent one of these types of establishments if I was feeling particularly home-sick (think TGI Fridays) but I can't bring myself to go in there knowing that the food outside of the American restaurant is actually better.
That said, I do often miss foods from home and I decided to make a list today of what I need should anyone out there in the Internet world (coughMOMcough) would want to send me.
- Fluff (I don't think I have had fluff since around 1996 but I will want it now.)
- Jif (Which used to be the name of a cleaning product here.)
- A hot pretzel (Still warm.)
- Kraft mac and cheese (The gooey cheese packet kind.)
- Cap'n Crunch Crunchberries
- Bisquik (So I don't have to make those sucky french pancakes -- did you hear that, mom? FRENCH!)
- More Jif (Because you can never have too much cleaning product sticking to the top of your mouth.)
- Combos with the pizza filling
- Hostess cupcakes (With the white squiggle on top.)
- Dingdongs (Hoohaa.)
- Root beer
- Diet Dr Pepper
- Grape nuts
For just mere dollars, you could help feed a sad expat. Do your part.